i don't know why i'm recently feeling really upset over really little things when it comes to my family or me and i think maybe i'm dying or something because there's really an urge in me to tell my parents, my brothers that i love them. everytime my dad or mum goes to work, i see them leave the door and in my head whispers, 'bye. i love you.' and i even had a dream where my friends told their mums that they love them and me being in my dream, still not daring to say a single word to my parents.
another thing that bugs me so much is my future; and of course that means my studies now and what i'm going to do when i graduate and stuffs. i already know what i want to be, but i'm not sure about how much i'll earn, how much i'm gonna give my parents every month, how to give them a comfortable life when i venture out into the working life.
as much as i hate studying, i keep telling myself that i have to study for the future. everyone is getting like 3.5 and above and i'm here getting less than that. sometimes i even wonder if i'll end up being a roadsweeper or some low paying job, only sufficient to raise myself.
