today ain't such a good day /: i went to church in the morning and didn't go in for service cos i was 'late' and i will only go in if i have like joe mel eunice at times. unless i'm early and no ones in the audi yet.
but today. they asked me to go in and i just couldn't bring myself to go in no matter how much i wana listen to the sermon. reason: scared. i don't know what i'm scared of. i rilly kinda hate my guts. but i guess today has made me realise this church isn't right for me i guess. the people don't really care about me. and i'm always usually alone and i know. they're gonna say, is they ask me alr but i don't wana go with them. infact. i'm always feeling like an extra and i know people are jugding me and saying i attention seeker ba /: haha. i feel so out of place there. so today after svc, i went home. and as usual no one realised so i made a final decision to quit this church. i ain't feeling good about this but. i made up my mind :)
you told me where i stand in your heart. but today. i really understood where i stand. you proven it to me :) i stand nowhere hahahhaha. wee :D shldnt have believed you from the start /: that one special day was just an excuse. it doesnt mean anything. neer will to you.
i'm really gonna miss like my friends there and i probably won't see them ever again. that'll probably make them happy anyway :) but don't worry, i won't forget about God :)
:'(
No comments:
Post a Comment