andrea.

and suddenly today i feel so angsty like i feel like i'm always the one doing things for people but people never really do anything for me. but gr i'm usually not like that but idk man! maybe still on period that's why ah. i really dislike it when all the bad thoughts come back to me whenever my period comes, it's like so damn depressing and i feel so useless and inferior and feel like nothing else but shit. and that's probably why i never like to talk deepdeep about myself and get quite worked up when it comes to me. because all i ever realise when i look inside of me is nothing but a failure. i can't even explain why my inferiority brings tears to my eyes sometimes, it's so GR. and i remember when i was playing a match, i knew i had to keep saying "i can do it!" but i try and try and i know deep inside i just can't. but i keep saying i can because i don't want the people around me to know i'm feeling like shit. 8( hopefully this is the last day of my damn period.

yesssss, haha. i'm actually quite proud of myself, i sent like two texts to pikabro to make sure he's not sad. i usually just don't care but then there's this thing that i always feel which is to never let someone go to sleep unhappy. yeah.